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By Kevin Higgins

Inspired by the apologies of British Labour Party leader Leader Keir Starmer for his party’s “anti-Semitism” and his recent appointment of a former Israeli intelligence officer as Labour’s head of social media.

To any white South Africans hurt 

by the anti-Apartheid movement.

To any tobacco plantation owner’s son barred 

by Emancipation from dragging his father’s 

private property for a spot of fish-eyed non-consensual

in a barn that has seen it all, 

despite the absolute lack of light in there.

To General Custer for any inconvenience 

caused by the tribes who sent him home 

by a road he did not know. 

To any Frenchmen or women

savages with Russian guns robbed 

of their own personal slice of Algeria.

To any Havana casino owners or pimps offended

by the extent of Fidel Castro’s facial hair. 

To the small part of Ian Paisley Junior that dies

every time someone calls Judea and Samaria

or Londonderry by its proper name. 

To any cats hurt by mice

who didn’t lie down and just 

let themselves be eaten.